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fashion

Fashion is just one of those things. Trends come in and out randomly, and they're never very impressive. But lately the world fashion industry has been having a sort of stroke.

Two years ago the biggest style was getting thick framed glasses.

This summer people are covering their faces in oils so that they break out in fake acne. 

And these new trends aren't stopping any time soon, they're only going to get more extreme. Luckily sources close to me have disclosed what the next few years of fads will be, and because I'm no hog, I'm going to give all of you sneak peak.

Two years from now; fake braces. I know it sounds crazy, but you would have said the same thing about the glasses three years ago. Take my word for it, and get your orthodontic work done now, before it gets too expensive.

Two years later models and celebrities will be ditching their designer handbags start sporting metal lunch tins. The hottest of the hot will have tins with the Beatles or The Monkees. Others will include Superman, Spiderman, and surprising KISS. 

Another year after that, fashion will ditch wallets and those caught up with the latest trends will start carrying their money and keys around their neck with lanyard keychains.

And the following fall we'll all realize this crasy fashion bullshit isn't about expressing ourselves or just fitting in, it's because no millennial is actually an adult, and we're doing these crazy fads because we don't know how to dress and act like a fucking grown up . Then we'll all move back in with our disappointed parents.

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