Follow Me: @TimidDimwit

list articles

Okay, alot of articles you're going to find these days all use the same 'buzzfeed' style list format. It's the laziest thing a writer can do. Some of us like to create content, not just spew out a dozen random things and give it a clickbait title.

Anyway, here are 12 I hate as much or more than list articles:

  1. Advertisements that you can't skip. I'm trying to watch a 30 second video, but you're making me watch two advertisments that are 20 seconds each, so by the time I finish watching all the ads and the video, I've given more of my time to you than to the video I actually wanted to watch, and that video wasn't even that good.
  2. Losing one sock in the laundry, then throwing away the one you still have left, only to find the sock that went missing in the first place
  3. When I'm drinking a soda and it has too much fizz. I'm trying to drink a soda here. Why do you need to have so many bubbles?
  4. When I need to talk to someone so I approach them, but they're already in a conversation. So I stand next to them for a while and they acknowledge me, but they still keep talking to the other person, then they start a whole new conversation with that person about a completely different topic, while I'm still standing there. And the thing I have to talk to them about would only take a minute, and if they just let me talk they could go back to whatever boring conversation they've just started. So I stand there for ten minutes and finally they turn to me and say "What's up", but by that time I've forgotten what I had to talk to them about.
  5. When people make one list item WAY longer than all the other items
  6. When I'm talking to my friend and another person comes up to talk to me. Obviously I'd rather talk to my friend, so I start another conversation, but this other person doesn't leave, then when I finally talk to them they don't even know what they wanted to say to me
  7. Soda's that don't have enough fizz in them. I just opened you, I know you aren't flat. Where the fuck are the bubbles.
  8. When people make a list item that's just a cheap callback to an earlier item. That's lazy and unoriginal.
  9. Hypocrisy
  10. When I get an alert that someone followed me on twitter, but when I go to check my followers there's no one new. Which means either that someone accidentally followed me, or they followed me, figured out who I am, then immediately unfollowed.
  11. People who constantly ask if I've seen their newest picture on Facebook or Instagram. No I haven't. I know you told me to check it out but I honestly don't care about you enough to scroll through a feed of pictures just to see the view from your latest hike. And I'm not going to search for just your profile because then you'll be in my recent search list and that's just awkward.
  12. When I go to the store to buy AAA batteries and I get home and realize that I now have a 32 pack of AA batteries, but still no AAA, and I don't want to go out and get more.
  13. When lists have more items than the titles says they will. What did you forget how to count? Either delete an item or change the title. It's not that hard dumbass.

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